Happy 70th birthday Chuck Norris...

[littleman77]

Being an adoptee, I've been known to joke that Chuck Norris is my biological father. I suppose I'll have to alter that to 'grandfather' now having learned his age.

I think I'll buy a Total Gym for myself as a birthday present to him.

[HTRN]

Well he did have a child with another woman while married to his first wife...but come on, we're talking about Chuck frikkin Norris. He may have bumped into her in line in the grocery store and got her pregnant.

He once got an entire convent of Nuns pregnant. That's how we got the 72 Miami Dolphins*.

*For those who don't know: the 72 Dolphins had a perfect season, including the Superbowl - the only team in NFL history to do so.


HTRN

[Scott Free]

He once got an entire convent of Nuns pregnant. That's how we got the 72 Miami Dolphins*.

*For those who don't know: the 72 Dolphins had a perfect season, including the Superbowl - the only team in NFL history to do so.

Not bad for a team made 11 out of their 17 wins with their 38-yr old backup QB, had to play an away playoff game despite having a perfect record, and that ran about 60% of the time -- and that was before all those pussy-ass-I-get-to-grab-onto-the-defensive-lineman rules they developed in '78 and onwards.

[Jericho941]

CRAP CRAP CRAP, I love the guy, now you tell me he was in the Air Force, CRAP!!!

Bwahahahaha

[mekender]

Keep on kicking Chuck.

I don't think I'd dare to kick CN, even if he is 70... You go first and I'll watch from a safe distance.

Ill bring along a phased plasma rifle in the 40 watt range and cover you from across the street.

[Rich Jordan]

Ill bring along a phased plasma rifle in the 40 watt range and cover you from across the street.

I suppose that might tickle CN. Just a little.

[mekender]

Ill bring along a phased plasma rifle in the 40 watt range and cover you from across the street.

I suppose that might tickle CN. Just a little.

Was figuring on it being enough to deflect the objects he threw at me.

[rightisright]

You guys would be well advised to stop this thread right now.

Sir Norris, please exempt me from any repercussions you wish to reign upon this forum. As you can see above, I tried to warn these heathens!

[MiddleAgedKen]

Not bad for a team made 11 out of their 17 wins with their 38-yr old backup QB, had to play an away playoff game despite having a perfect record, and that ran about 60% of the time -- and that was before all those pussy-ass-I-get-to-grab-onto-the-defensive-lineman rules they developed in '78 and onwards.

That "ran about 60% of the time" stat is evidence of the Biggest Mistake the Hall of Fame Selection Committee Made: Bob Griese. Also, just about the first team they played with a winning record all season was the Browns in the first round of the playoffs, and the Browns durn near laid 'em low. (Can't tell you how much I used to love that razzin frazzin team, when I was a kid...I could live with the periodic forays into mediocrity from the '70s on, but cutting Kosar in '93 broke me -- by the time Modell announced the move, I would have helped him pack).

Scott's right about the OL blocking rules, though. Even before '78 they were starting to change. I played youth football through '74 under the old rules as a messenger guard. Took freshman year off to try a paper route (Akron Beacon Journal was still an afternoon paper then), and then came back at the request of a good friend to play bantam (freshman/sophomore, 140# weight limit) ball for Kenmore, which only had about 26 kids on the team. By then (1976) offensive linemen were allowed to extend their arms away from the body, although they still couldn't grab at that time. I couldn't get the hang of it, and kept pass blocking the old way (D-line grabs, drive your forearms up through his arms to break contact and take one retreat step, lather, rinse, repeat).

And on that note, :jacked:

[Dub_James]

Keep on kicking Chuck.

I don't think I'd dare to kick CN, even if he is 70... You go first and I'll watch from a safe distance.

When it comes to Chuck Norris, there is no safe distance. Only blast range.