The Gun Counter

Spielberg to produce & direct the biopic, and you won't believe the casting...

While the thought is appreciated, the self-parody is undoubtedly funnier if all the presumed laugh lines aren't in fact straight lines, if one's presidential approval ratings are somewhere north of what Nixon's were during the depths of Watergate, if the economy isn't teetering on the brink of an apocalyptic worldwide depression, and if liberty itself isn't at its lowest ebb on this continent since the reign of King George III.

Instead, it doesn't come off as humor, so much as pointing out that the country elected the class jackass, and now his idea of being presidential is wearing the lampshade on his head and pulling his pants down 24/7/365, instead of just for 15 minutes a year at the annual Correspondent's Dinner. If he gets any worse at this job - if such is possible without surrendering the country to some foreign power - even the prospect of President Joe Biden won't be sufficient assassination insurance to protect him any longer, and the likeliest agents of change at that point are his own protective detail, presuming they aren't already reduced to carrying rubber guns now.

He either needs to start wearing floppy shoes and a red nose and rainbow wig to work to set the proper tone, or go on a three-year vacation to Camp David, and pray people forget about him after a few months, just to improve his image. He's already got Worst President In American History clinched by a comfortable margin, and all he's doing now is running up the score to put it beyond reach pretty much forever.

Aesop wrote: the likeliest agents of change at that point are his own protective detail, presuming they aren't already reduced to carrying rubber guns now.

I've often wondered about those guys (and gals) and how horribly degrading that job must be. (and no, I'm not suggesting for an instant that his protective detail should be "agents of change".) But, I'm assuming that the folks on his protective detail are fairly intelligent, highly trained, extremely motivated individuals. There must be a lot of interaction with the drones that hover around a person with a personal protection mission.

I was once the OIC on a detail to provide a personal protection mission for a group of high-ranking (think 3-star grade) State department weenies and I had them for two weeks. I was running the protection detail and was tasked with covering them 24/7. I had about 40 good, all-American MPs on the detail and I put those kids through hell. The amount of picayune buillshit was simply staggering, and these were low-level drones. I can't imagine how much horseshit would come with high-level drones. After their little education visit was completed, I put them on a plane (at an Air Force base) and waited till they went wheels-up, then took my detail to the NCO club and stood the bar tab for an hour. Then, I wrote them all up (from the E-8 in charge to the E-1s that manned traffic points) for commendation decorations.

My point is that even at that low level, the amount of horseshit is simply soul-crushing. I can't imagine the level of pure aggravation that providing personal protection to a president might entail. After a couple of weeks, I'd be tempted to bitch-slap any of the hovering drones that approached me. I'm probably not well-suited for a personal protection mission.

When the current White House resident was elected, I opined that we had elected a man who could make Bill Clinton look honest, and Jimmy Carter look competent. In fact, I promised that "when this is all over, we'll be able to look back on the Carter administration and say "Y'know, that wasn't really all that bad!""

I didn't realize that understatement was one of my superpowers.

First Shirt wrote:When the current White House resident was elected, I opined that we had elected a man who could make Bill Clinton look honest, and Jimmy Carter look competent. In fact, I promised that "when this is all over, we'll be able to look back on the Carter administration and say "Y'know, that wasn't really all that bad!""

I didn't realize that understatement was one of my superpowers.

Were you bitten by a radioactive Englishman?

PawPaw wrote:

Aesop wrote: the likeliest agents of change at that point are his own protective detail, presuming they aren't already reduced to carrying rubber guns now.

I've often wondered about those guys (and gals) and how horribly degrading that job must be. (and no, I'm not suggesting for an instant that his protective detail should be "agents of change".) But, I'm assuming that the folks on his protective detail are fairly intelligent, highly trained, extremely motivated individuals. There must be a lot of interaction with the drones that hover around a person with a personal protection mission.

I was once the OIC on a detail to provide a personal protection mission for a group of high-ranking (think 3-star grade) State department weenies and I had them for two weeks. I was running the protection detail and was tasked with covering them 24/7. I had about 40 good, all-American MPs on the detail and I put those kids through hell. The amount of picayune buillshit was simply staggering, and these were low-level drones. I can't imagine how much horseshit would come with high-level drones. After their little education visit was completed, I put them on a plane (at an Air Force base) and waited till they went wheels-up, then took my detail to the NCO club and stood the bar tab for an hour. Then, I wrote them all up (from the E-8 in charge to the E-1s that manned traffic points) for commendation decorations.

My point is that even at that low level, the amount of horseshit is simply soul-crushing. I can't imagine the level of pure aggravation that providing personal protection to a president might entail. After a couple of weeks, I'd be tempted to bitch-slap any of the hovering drones that approached me. I'm probably not well-suited for a personal protection mission.

Shrillery was supposedly murder on her protection detail, going back to the State Troopers in Arkansas. The story about her cursing a blue streak when one wished her "good morning," comes to mind.

skb12172 wrote:Shrillery was supposedly murder on her protection detail, going back to the State Troopers in Arkansas. The story about her cursing a blue streak when one wished her "good morning," comes to mind.

More on that. Snopes says it's "unverified", but the descriptions of the personalities match what the vibe I get from their public appearances.

Agency gossip is that prior to 1992, the Secret Service PPD was volunteers only, "thanks for your app, and we'll let you know".
From 93-01, and '09-yesterday, they had to start drafting T-men (and women) to do the job.

George guy wrote:

First Shirt wrote:When the current White House resident was elected, I opined that we had elected a man who could make Bill Clinton look honest, and Jimmy Carter look competent. In fact, I promised that "when this is all over, we'll be able to look back on the Carter administration and say "Y'know, that wasn't really all that bad!""

I didn't realize that understatement was one of my superpowers.

Were you bitten by a radioactive Englishman?

We all have to unleash our inner Norman Clegg at times. If it's okay with everyone else, that is.

Even though he'll have to dumb his act down and make an ass of himself on camera to portray Obama, I think Chris Tucker would be perfect for the part.