Hilarious Bumper Stickers

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Hilarious Bumper Stickers

Save the whales. Collect the whole set.

The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.

A day without sunshine is like, night.

On the other hand, you have different fingers.

I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted then used against you.

Honk if you love peace and quiet.

Remember half the people you know are below average.

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

He who laughs last thinks slowest.

I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.

Borrow money from a pessimist - they don't expect it back.

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

My mind is like a steel trap - rusty and illegal in 37 states.

The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane and going the wrong way.

Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.

No one is listening until you make a mistake.

Success always occurs in private and failure in full view.

The hardness of butter is directly proportional to the softness of the bread.

The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the ability to reach it.

Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.