Puns

[MarkD]

A mushroom walks into a bar, the bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom replied "Why not? I'm a fun guy!"

A snail buys a red Corvette and paints a big yellow S on the hood and one on each door. He likes to drive it really fast. So now when people see him they don't say "Look at the snail" they say "Look at that S-car go!"

[Cybrludite]

juststalin.jpg

[First Shirt]

"He who would pun, would pick a pocket."

[Kommander]

From the "Heading, briefly to NYC" thread:

Great seafood - AquaGrill if they aren't flooded out - worked there

[Weetabix]

Arnold Schwartzenegger's IT guy told him he needed to upgrade to Windows 7.

Arnold replied, "I still love Vista, baby!"

[MarkD]

Arnold Schwartzenegger's IT guy told him he needed to upgrade to Windows 7.

Arnold replied, "I still love Vista, baby!"

There's a plan in the works to make a movie about famous composers starring action heroes. Sylvester Stallone agreed to play Mozart, Bruce Willis will play Beethoven, and Arnold Shwartzenegger said "I'll be Bach".

[Rod]

Mother and I were watching a nature show about wild animals as pets. This was when I was on leave from the Army for a few days. One 80 plus year old woman had found a baby beaver and raised it. She was holding it in her lap during the interview and my mother said in amazement, "I've never seen a woman with a 60 pound beaver."

Not exactly a pun but close enough for this bunch.

[rightisright]

John sent ten different puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

[SoupOrMan]

My dad was assigned to a crime scene one night about 25 years ago where a would-be copper thief decided to try cutting live wires with a pair of bolt cutters because eh couldn't find any copper wire elsewhere. Dad was asked what happened by a local reporter. There was enough left of the corpse to identify this guy as one of the habitual car thieves in town. Dad says to the reporter "Well, he tried to graduate from breaking into cars to breaking into power plants. He really impressed us by showing so much ambition so we decided to let him off easy this time with a grounding."

The reporter then asked Dad in all seriousness how anyone could give such a light sentence for attempted burglary instead of prison time.

I think that's when Dad started a campaign of making sure I never entered a journalism program in college.

[evan price]

A mushroom walks into a bar, the bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom replied "Why not? I'm a fun guy!"

So, what's the morel of the story?