The Jehovah's Witnesses In My Neighborhood

skb12172 · Post by **skb12172** » Sat Sep 14, 2013 3:31 pm

Are starting to use pre-teen girls, with no supervision, to go door-to-door spreading The Word. The two who came by my house this morning were between 10-12 years old. Noooo, there's no way that could end up badly. WTF???

blackeagle603 · Post by **blackeagle603** » Sat Sep 14, 2013 3:35 pm

Q: What happens when a Jehovah's Witness marries an Atheist?

A: They have kids that go knocking on doors for no reason.

Aesop · Post by **Aesop** » Sat Sep 14, 2013 9:57 pm

I think they're aiming on cutting down on the guys that answer the door for them with Penthouse opened to the centerfold, with a beer in the other hand, and buck nekkid. Now I suppose they'll have to at least wear a jock strap.

However, it does nothing against people smart enough to rig a sprinkler pointed at the front porch on a lightswitch controlled from inside the front door.

And yes, they're asstards for doing this, but when have JWs not been willing to sacrifice their children for their kookie beliefs?

Yogimus · Post by **Yogimus** » Sun Sep 15, 2013 5:29 am

Grab child, drag inside house.

Termite · Post by **Termite** » Sun Sep 15, 2013 12:30 pm

Aesop wrote:I think they're aiming on cutting down on the guys that answer the door for them with Penthouse opened to the centerfold, [strike]with a beer in the other hand[/strike], and buck nekkid.

JW's are allowed to consume alcohol in moderation.

PawPaw · Post by **PawPaw** » Mon Sep 16, 2013 5:20 pm

Termite wrote:JW's are allowed to consume alcohol in moderation.

I am forever amazed at the depth of knowledge of this forum, but I'm tempted to ask; You know that exactly how?

I don't believe that I've ever had a Jehovah's Witness in my circle of friends close enough to drink a Friday afternoon beer. There used to be some who trolled the student ghetto in Natchitoches, but they were subjected to nearly universal scorn and ridicule.

Termite · Post by **Termite** » Mon Sep 16, 2013 6:59 pm

PawPaw wrote:I am forever amazed at the depth of knowledge of this forum, but I'm tempted to ask; You know that exactly how?

Way back in college, I dated one* for a very short time. They don't actually approve of alcohol consumption, but they don't forbid it either.

*It was a disaster. I don't recommend it.

NVGdude · Post by **NVGdude** » Sun Sep 22, 2013 9:08 pm

Back in college I was awoken one morning by someone ringing the doorbell.

I answered the door wearing a towel and a revolver. (Must have been a Dan Wesson)

The Jehovah's witnesses took one look at me, said "sorry, wrong address" packed up their Watchtowers and left.

Now I'm convinced that the JW's must have some equivalent of a hobo mark, because they never came back to that address for years.

skb12172 · Post by **skb12172** » Sun Sep 22, 2013 9:35 pm

You're killin' me, Smalls...

Yogimus · Post by **Yogimus** » Sun Sep 22, 2013 10:46 pm

"I am sorry but I am already in an abusive relationship with Jesus Christ, and if he sees us talking, he'll whoop me something fierce.

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