"The Walking Dead"

[staylor]

The real problems with the show aren't the setting so much as the fact that they weren't really given enough of a budget to pull off what they're trying to accomplish. Entire episodes that could be about something turn into an hour of whispered arguments with a zombie at either end of the episode to remind you that it's supposed to take place in a zombie apocalypse.

I'm hoping the third season will be better, but I wouldn't bank on it.

Apparently the network did double the number of episodes in Season 2 while simultaneously cutting the budget, that did cause some episodes to be ridiculously thin, especially in the first half of season 2. However in the second half of the seaon they overcame their weaknesses and got much better. Season 3, at least from the trailers released so far does look pretty awesome. There is a zombie infested prison, a crazy dictator, a black ninja chick and a Merle is back with a knife for a hand.
I will say that season two was 90% crap. That said, the season finale, where they find the girl, was some of the best TV I have ever seen. Really.

I will say that season two was 90% crap. That said, the season finale, where they find the girl, was some of the best TV I have ever seen. Really.

That episode was actually only the midseason finale of Season 2, there are 7 more episodes after it and, as I said, they are much better than the first half.

As for most here, I don't suppose that it would too much to suggest that it can be fun to sit back and enjoy a show without bitching about how stupid the characters act (people are stupid, Obama is president) or how the zombies dont conform to your own imaginary ideal.

[Highspeed]

It's easy to please me with a zombie series, this is how.

1) No character development. This isn't Shakespeare. I want my characters to be one dimensional stereotypes, here's a list of acceptable ones :-

Woody Harrelson type badass, ex Green Beret for maximum bonus points
Biker, maybe several bikers, lots of bikers
Redneck
Black guy - a cop or a gangsta, flip a coin. If he's a cop then he must be a USMC vet ( it's movie law )
Feisty Hispanic chick - and give her an awesome katana or a big fucking spear or something
Other good looking chicks to provide eye candy and someone for the above characters to rescue

Here's a list of characters I don't want :-

Children, in any way shape or form unless they are Hit Girl or already zombies
Women with 'issues'
Women who are pregnant
Women who are not hot chicks
Normal regular everyday living people, especially ones who - when handed a weapon - flinch and say " I don't really like guns "
Dogs, because they always have to rescue the stupid bloody dog

2) Guns. Just because the dead have risen from their graves and are preying upon the living that is no reason to suppose that the worlds gunshops, private firearm stashes and National Guard armouries have vanished from the face of the Earth. I want guns. Lots and lots of guns. To compensate for the huge amount of guns and the awesome marksmanship of the stereotype badass characters - just make the fucking zombies run fast or something. Hire a shitload more extras too

3) Realistic weapons. I do not want to see characters firing 60 rounds from an M-4 without reloading. Or revolvers with safety catches, or frag grenades that explode like mini-nukes and vapourise every zombie within half a click. Send the actors on a weapon training course so they don't look like the Hollyweird fairies they actually are

4) Gore. Huge and copious amounts of gore. When I want horror that is subtle and psychological I read a HP Lovecraft book. This is not a HP Lovecraft book so I'd like buckets of blood, intestines, eyeballs and braaaaiiiiiiiins please. Maybe some pus, or ichor, or generic zombie green gloop too

5) Plot. Not important, given enough of the previous (#4) - a plot is not a substitute for a huge fucking explosion with the lead characters walking away from it in slow motion, or a witty catchphrase used while despatching one of the ravening undead hordes

6) Music. Loud angry rock music with lots of swearing in the lyrics

There, it's not so hard is it ?

[Jericho941]

It's easy to please me with a zombie series, this is how.

1) No character development. This isn't Shakespeare. I want my characters to be one dimensional stereotypes, here's a list of acceptable ones :-

Feisty Hispanic chick

Mr. Credenza, is that you?

Here's a list of characters I don't want :-

See, without any of these, what the hell is left for this incredibly homoerotic band of manly men to do? What challenges will they overcome?

Besides, feisty latinas don't get rescued. They die. You need a woman with "issues" to be your damsel in distress.

2) Guns. Just because the dead have risen from their graves and are preying upon the living that is no reason to suppose that the worlds gunshops, private firearm stashes and National Guard armouries have vanished from the face of the Earth. I want guns. Lots and lots of guns. To compensate for the huge amount of guns and the awesome marksmanship of the stereotype badass characters - just make the fucking zombies run fast or something. Hire a shitload more extras too

I've played this game, it's called Left 4 Dead.

Seriously though, without making most of the guns in America disappear or rendered non-functional, even fast zombies are totaly laughable. Which is why in L4D they simply made the disease airborne and infect EVERYONE. You're either a mosltly-immune typhoid Mary, vulnerable and doomed to live your life at MOPP4, or a zombie.

3) Realistic weapons. I do not want to see characters firing 60 rounds from an M-4 without reloading. Or revolvers with safety catches, or frag grenades that explode like mini-nukes and vapourise every zombie within half a click. Send the actors on a weapon training course so they don't look like the Hollyweird fairies they actually are

So you want stupid action movie stereotypes without any of the massive explosion fun of stupid action movies?

5) Plot. Not important, given enough of the previous (#4) - a plot is not a substitute for a huge fucking explosion with the lead characters walking away from it in slow motion, or a witty catchphrase used while despatching one of the ravening undead hordes

Tough guys show up, explode zombies in slow motion, the end. Every episode.

And people were complaining about zombies being played out. I can't see how this could possibly get old.

[Highspeed]

My band of manly stereotypes aren't homoerotic ( note to self, avoid use of Judas Priest music for soundtrack )

And I like my unrealism realistic, OK ?

I'm prepared to allow the kickass Latina to live through the whole series as well - it'll be something groundbreaking and avant garde, like in those French art movies.

There could even be some educational value, like this :-

Scene, middle of overwhelming zombie attack, two dudes fighting for their lives

Biker :- Hey Black Cop Dude, I see that when you hit the bolt release on your M-4 you only use your thumb instead of slapping it, why is that ?
Black Cop Dude :- Well, Biker, I feel like the slap is an un-neccessary waste of effort and actually takes longer than simply using my thumb. Like this, see ?
Biker :- ( thumbs up to camera ) Thanks, Black Cop Dude

Isn't that the best dialogue you have ever read ? I might write a script and send it to Hollywood or wherever the hell it is they make this crap

[Darrell]

It's easy to please me with a zombie series, this is how.

6) Music. Loud angry rock music with lots of swearing in the lyrics

There, it's not so hard is it ?

HS, have you ever seen Return Of The Living Dead? It's like punk rockers vs zombies, some great music, still my all time favorite zombie movie. Funny too.

ROTL2 was lame, but ROTL3 featured a young Mindy/Melinda Clarke (aka Nandy from Firefly's Heart of Gold episode, also Lady Heather the dominatrix in whatever cop show it was), as the hottest dead chick evar!

[Highspeed]

I think I've seen every zombie movie ever made, but they have all blended into one over time.

Just took a look at the first 10 mins of Return of the Living Dead on YouTube and I can't believe I'd forgotten about it. Thanks a lot.

It's getting late here, wife's gone to bed early, wind is absolutely howling and the cloudbase has covered the mountainside. Oh yeah, and during the Franco era the peasants were often buried in the countryside instead of a cemetery in town -there is one grave less than 750 metres away from our place

Perfect time for a beer and a Zombie movie I think...

[skb12172]

It's easy to please me with a zombie series, this is how.

6) Music. Loud angry rock music with lots of swearing in the lyrics

There, it's not so hard is it ?

HS, have you ever seen Return Of The Living Dead? It's like punk rockers vs zombies, some great music, still my all time favorite zombie movie. Funny too.

ROTL2 was lame, but ROTL3 featured a young Mindy/Melinda Clarke (aka Nandy from Firefly's Heart of Gold episode, also Lady Heather the dominatrix in whatever cop show it was), as the hottest dead chick evar!

AND the first one was set in the lovely metropolis of Louisville, KY!!!

As for #3, Mindy Clarke is proof that God exists and wants us to be happy...

[skb12172]

I think I've seen every zombie movie ever made, but they have all blended into one over time.

Just took a look at the first 10 mins of Return of the Living Dead on YouTube and I can't believe I'd forgotten about it. Thanks a lot.

It's getting late here, wife's gone to bed early, wind is absolutely howling and the cloudbase has covered the mountainside. Oh yeah, and during the Franco era the peasants were often buried in the countryside instead of a cemetery in town -there is one grave less than 750 metres away from our place

Perfect time for a beer and a Zombie movie I think...

Have you ever seen "Dead Girl?" Thoughts, please...

[HTRN]

Forget badasses.

We need a noble hero, a bunch of schlubs to protect(which they fail at, or at least the hero does), and an "enthusiastic" sidekick to chew on the scenery. Let's face it, it's the Belkars, Richards, Shor Pibalds, of the story that make us laugh and laugh...

[Highspeed]

Have you ever seen "Dead Girl?" Thoughts, please...

Nope, I'll check that out...

Zombie movie night turned into a real horror story - enormous storm arrived with torrential rain that carried on into yesterday evening, lightning struck right next to the house at one point and tripped all the breakers.
Seven people dead in the region, roads washed away. We haven't been into town yet to see what damage was done there.