New TV pilot reviews

[Aesop]

Meh.
My record for working on pilots that go anywhere remains almost perfectly unbesmirched without any winners that got picked up for going on a decade or so.
Feck'em all, they've all sucked pretty much without exception.

In the industry's defense, as shitty as the ones you see are, try and imagine the 5-times-as-many you never see, which were even worse.
Some things, I just can't unsee.

[randy]

Madam Secretary:

My impression is that this a back door Shrillary campaign support activity, giving warm fuzzies to the unwashed masses about how cool, smart and sexy a female Secretary of State is and wouldn't she be great as president?

The fact that Tea Leone and HC are only biologically similar as human females...

[Erik]

Madam Secretary:

My impression is that this a back door Shrillary campaign support activity, giving warm fuzzies to the unwashed masses about how cool, smart and sexy a female Secretary of State is and wouldn't she be great as president?

You mean it's an updated Commander in Chief?
That one was so blatantly battleground preparation and campaign PR that it was ridiculous. Though the people that made it was so fully sold on the concept that they failed to make the female president the "super president" they obviously wanted. Generally, the President (that was supposed to be extremely competent) came off as a moron that wanted to do whatever popped into her head at the time, and changed her mind the instant someone told her what a stupid idea it was, without even considering any other options.

[Aesop]

Madam Secretary:

My impression is that this a back door Shrillary campaign support activity, giving warm fuzzies to the unwashed masses about how cool, smart and sexy a female Secretary of State is and wouldn't she be great as president?

The fact that Tea Leone and HC are only biologically similar as human females...

Dave
The American President
The West Wing

If I could have the sort of candidates for real the Left dreams up in Hollywood, I'd vote for them.
They are all, and always, alas, Potemkin Presidents.

Oh, and I've met Tea Leoni at work, and seen her legs.
She and HRC aren't even the same species.
Not least of which because Tea is a genetic female.

Alas, even that isn't enough to save her show.

[Aesop]

If I told you how little direction is involved in TV, you'd be amazed. I've seen guest directors who never got out of their chair.
Some who could have phoned it in from their trailer. A couple who virtually did.
They're mainly there to make sure they get the shot, which is filmschool stuff much of the time.
TV is a writer-driven medium more than others, so when a show sucks, new or old, it's not hard to figure out why.
Bad plot, bad premise, bad characters, bad dialogue...all those bucks stop on the same desk.
If it ain't on the page, it ain't on the stage, is the rule of thumb.

The other caveat is
"Gone With The Wind in the morning, Dukes of Hazzard in the afternoon."
Because when some poor misinformed soul shows up to a TV show, and thinks he's directing a feature, they spend all morning trying for artsy-fartsy crap, dig themselves in a time-deficit hole, the line producer has a chat with them at mealbreak, and we come back and start blasting through setups like it was student film, trying to catch up on everything we need before the sun goes down/comes up, or the location rental fee and/or crew salary is about to go into double-time penalty.

That goes triply so on pilots and new shows, because unless the creator/show runner has a budget, common sense, and some idea of his business, everyone from the top down struggles to figure out what they're doing 24/7/365.

The best thing I can compare new shows to, without those steadying influences, is like watching blind retarded kids with bullhorns tell deaf autistic kids on crutches how to assemble Ferraris from bins of assorted car parts in the pits right before the race. While Godzilla, on acid, is rampaging through the area.
Then somebody yells, "Action!"

(If anybody makes that last into a reality show, all I ask is 1/2% of the 1st year's budget, and the standard residual contract for re-runs.)

[Greg]

I've known Ben Edlund for... I dunno, 25 years or so? Though I haven't talked to him in a few years.

He's showrunner on Gotham this year. I haven't watched it yet, but it looks really interesting. Just before this he was showrunner on Supernatural for six years, taking it in the second season. He was story editor, script supervisor and co-head writer on Angel for a couple years, and he was Joss's number 2 guy on firefly behind Tim Minear.

Ben has some very interesting... and profane... things to say about being a creator without control of the show, vs. a jr. writer, vs a sr. or head writer, vs. a director, vs. being a showrunner... and how showrunning something you created is totally different from doing it on someone elses creation.

Huh... just realized, last I talked to him was just after Serenity... that was a weird time for me... Married Mel just a few months later though.

I know a few other folks behind the camera mostly in scifi but some mainstream stuff, because of my friend network, and because I was a con geek my whole life. Oh and a WHOLE CRAPTON of writers.

And for going out of your way to watch those pilots, you're also a glutton for punishment.

[George guy]

I would like to see a sitcom about the crew behind some fictional TV series that has just entered its fourth season and is struggling not to jump the shark.
(Elevator: The Office meets WKRP behind the scenes of Star Trek)

[Rod]

Chris, took your advice and watched The Blacklist pilot and second episode on Netflix. Have to watch the rest over the weekend. Some plot holes but very interesting.

[HTRN]

I would like to see a sitcom about the crew behind some fictional TV series that has just entered its fourth season and is struggling not to jump the shark.
(Elevator: The Office meets WKRP behind the scenes of Star Trek)

Sounds like a crew version of 30 Rock.