WEEeeeeellllll CRAP.

[Dedicated_Dad]

All offers are greatly appreciated - as always I'm humbled at the sheer, basic goodness of so many amazing folks I've never actually met...

I'm back to leaning toward flying - wifey found a $200 round-trip fare! I was SHOCKED, but apparently flying on the right day and staying a while really brings the price down... At that price it would be stupid for me NOT to fly. The Boy's roomie or GF would pick me up at the AP, and I'd have use of his truck for the duration.

Next weekend we're scheduled to take the kid to college orientation, so I won't be going before then. I'll be amazed if he's home that soon, anyway...

Got the call this AM - they took him back to surgery and did the fasciotomy - pressure spiked overnight. Talked to him for the first time this afternoon - he's surprisingly lucid and all-in-all seems to be handling it well, though he's inordinately worried about the possible necessity of the skin-graft because he doesn't want an ugly-@$$ scar like I have. He's more worried about the possibility of a scar than he is about anything else -- typical for him in some ways...

Also found out what he did... He and another guy went full-steam for the same ball. He kicked with all his might, and both of them connected at the same instant. He hit the other guy's shin and his tibia spiral-fractured into a bunch of little bits. He's always worn the "short" shin-guards, which probably contributed to the problem rather than reducing it.

He's been fighting them over pain-meds: He had the same problem I did... They gave him the "magic button" but he falls asleep and doesn't push it, then wakes up screaming and can't get enough out of the machine to knock it back down. They started giving him a steady "baseline" dose of dilaudid and cut back how much he gets from the button while still allowing him some control...

I haven't even broached the subject of going out there with him yet - I figure a couple more days will be good for him to get his mind around things so he'll realize just how much help he's going to need. He's still talking about having to get back on his feet in time to follow his orders and report for his new assignment - 3 weeks from now - which indicates he really doesn't know what he's in for. His worry about the scar also tells me he's still got no grasp on just how bad he's hurt.

This isn't unusual - I vividly remember sitting on the side of the road with my leg in pieces, waiting on the 'copter, telling wifey "I've had a broken leg before - it's going to be a rough couple of months but I'll be OK..." It takes time for things to become clear to us... So... I'm waiting to hear that it's really "hit him" before I broach the subject of coming out to stay and help him.

If I bring it up too soon he'll reject it, and he's too hard-headed to change his mind... I know he's going to need help, and with me not working I'm the only logical choice. That I've lived through everything he's dealing with, and have the knowledge to talk to his Docs makes the whole thing a no-brainer.

Thanks again for everything - at this point if I go it seems almost a guarantee it will be on a big bird, though...

DD

[workinwifdakids]

You're more than welcome, DD. And if plans change, tell us, and we'll do what needs doing. Also, if you do come out, would you also let us know? I for one would really like to break bread with you while you're out here, despite wishing we could do it under more favorable circumstances.

Oh, and on a different but related note: I had surgery at Balboa Naval Medical Center some time ago, and have never been to a better, more professional facility (private or public) in my life. And let's just say I've been a guest at enough hospitals to qualify me as an expert.


Anyway, at that time, ADMIRALS were flying in from all over the world to get care there. I considered myself quite lucky to be there. That's where I assume he is, and hope that lends you some comfort.

[308Mike]

Doesn't he know, chicks DIG scars?!?!?!?!?!

[blackeagle603]

Balboa? Amen. Good people but seriously overworked/understaffed.

Sounds like he's mostly coherent so it shouldn't be as big a deal, but, the phrase "Balboa Boo-Boo" doesn't come from nothing.

Ideally you can have someone there (family or friend) 24/7 to act as a patient advocate for him. i.e. Know what his name is, what's on his chart, what med's he's getting (and not getting), what procedures they've got lined up for him -- due to work load the staff has a rep for getting stressed, shuffled and mixed up. "Oh you're THAT patient?!"

[HTRN]

Doesn't he know, chicks DIG scars?!?!?!?!?!

Then why ain't I hip deep in broads?

Oh wait.

It's because I'm a tactless asshole, isn't it?


HTRN

[308Mike]

Well, the scars need to be VISIBLE, and you need to have a story about how you were just doing your job and saved the world as a by-product. Just another day at the office being a Super Hero!!

[Dedicated_Dad]

Balboa? Amen. Good people but seriously overworked/understaffed.

Sounds like he's mostly coherent so it shouldn't be as big a deal, but, the phrase "Balboa Boo-Boo" doesn't come from nothing.

Ideally you can have someone there (family or friend) 24/7 to act as a patient advocate for him. i.e. Know what his name is, what's on his chart, what med's he's getting (and not getting), what procedures they've got lined up for him -- due to work load the staff has a rep for getting stressed, shuffled and mixed up. "Oh you're THAT patient?!"

SHIAT. We're actually getting concerned about exactly that - GF says it's a different Doc every time, can't get a straight answer... Looks like I may need to jump and go...

He's on Dilaudid - he's out of his frigging GOURD. He's also having problems with nausea, and the anti-emetic knocks him out. GF says he'll have a conversation, doze off in the middle of a sentence, then wake up and start saying or asking the same thing. She's got to go to work tomorrow, and he's scheduled for another surgery to (hopefully) close the fasciotomy incisions... We're praying he doesn't need the skin-graft - as stupid as it sounds it seems this is what he's most worried about - he doesn't want an ugly leg like mine...

He's also VERY resistant to anyone coming out - he's proud and independent, but also afraid his Dad will show up -- he told me point-blank "if you come, HE'LL have to come, and I'd rather be alone than have him here..." (Though I try to change it, he wants little or nothing to do with his Dad...)

I've been waiting for it to "hit" him - just how screwed up he is, and how hard it's going to be - but it's not happening. He doesn't want to feel he's weak and needs help, but OTOH there's NOONE more qualified than me to be his advocate - I've lived everything he's living and much, much more...

DAMN.

We're supposed to take my daughter to a college-orientation next weekend, so I was TRYING to wait until that's over, but Wifey may just have to handle it... Of course THAT brings up "mommy" issues if step-mom goes and Mom doesn't, even though Mom couldn't normally be bothered, doesn't know the school, can't drive over a bridge (panics)... she'll still have an absolute CONNIPTION if Wifey takes the kid...

I'm going to call him and push a bit...

DD

[HTRN]

Well, the scars need to be VISIBLE, and you need to have a story about how you were just doing your job and saved the world as a by-product.

Ahem:



HTRN

[blackeagle603]

The eagle has landed. DD just rolled in and is crashing in the garage/granny flat. A bit keyed up and jet lagged but looks to be in one piece.

Balboa let him in after hours for a quick trip to his son's room. Let's see how he sleeps after that.

[Mike OTDP]

Doesn't he know, chicks DIG scars?!?!?!?!?!

Then why ain't I hip deep in broads?

Oh wait.

It's because I'm a tactless asshole, isn't it?


HTRN

No, the chicks dig the duelling scars. The sort you get at Heidelberg.