A salute to parents from a micro-parent.

[HTRN]

useful things like music CDs, porn, and beer.

Spoken like a true bachelor.


HTRN

[toad]

Hey, I was married once, in 1975? One summer. Briefly, very briefly. It was one of those lower brain things. When I think about the chances of having had a child with that woman, I get a brief spurt of religious passion and want to go down on my knees and shout, "THANK GOD that didn't happen." I'll never forget whatshername.

[Lokidude]

Toad, I know the feeling. I was married three years. No kids, thank God. Before we got married, she seemed like the greatest woman alive. Immediately after the wedding, I learned that her frigidity approaches Arctic levels. Immediately after the divorce, she REALLY went nuts. Like, completely unhinged, accuses me of cheating (about the worst insult to any man with honor), has stated that she wants to make me miserable, etc. Luckily for me, she has no clue where I live, refuses to drive anywhere (entirely capable, just refuses, I was her chauffer), and is dumb enough not to be able to pursue any remote asshattery. I was more than happy to pay the legal fees for my divorce, it was the cost of freedom.

[Netpackrat]

If I ever see "scott" again I intend to apologize for the beating...

Damn. For what it's worth, I don't think you have any need to apologize. It sounds like you did him one huge favor.

[The Wizard]

Would you like to adopt a 16 yr old girl? You can have mine.

She would bug you to death about buying her a car.........or at least giving her your baby Ninja. BTW, do you still have it?

Hey Termite ill take her, as soon as i get out of the Army, 2 years from now lol jk

[First Shirt]

You're a good man Toad.

I agree! But don't worry, we won't tell anybody; your secret is safe with us.

[toad]

Wizard:

You'd better be careful, Termite may think you are just negotiating, and make a counter offer.
Before you know it you'll be married to a teenager going through the hormone stage and locked into a contract to work on an oil platform when you get out of the Army.

I've recently talked to guys who had teenage girls. Some talk in quite voices about the periods that their daughter went from daddy's girl to the "My dad's a dick" mode.
One got over it when she was 17, two of them didn't decide their old man was OK until they graduated from college and had to work in the real world. Then it all made sense to them. One ran off and married a moma's boy who dumped her after she had the second child. Her father arranged spies to make sure that she and the kids were doing OK. She remarried to someone decent eventually. Now he gets his revenge on her by spoiling the grandkids before sending them back to his daughter. "But Grandpa let's us stay past 9:00 PM."

[Termite]

Wizard:

You'd better be careful, Termite may think you are just negotiating, and make a counter offer.
Before you know it you'll be married to a teenager going through the hormone stage and locked into a contract to work on an oil platform when you get out of the Army.

I've recently talked to guys who had teenage girls. Some talk in quite voices about the periods that their daughter went from daddy's girl to the "My dad's a dick" mode.
One got over it when she was 17, two of them didn't decide their old man was OK until they graduated from college and had to work in the real world. Then it all made sense to them. One ran off and married a moma's boy who dumped her after she had the second child. Her father arranged spies to make sure that she and the kids were doing OK. She remarried to someone decent eventually. Now he gets his revenge on her by spoiling the grandkids before sending them back to his daughter. "But Grandpa let's us stay past 9:00 PM."

It's obvious Wizard doesn't know the true cost of females, or he wouldn't make an "offer" for a 16 yr old. He'd be looking for a 20-something ICU nurse.

[toad]

The thing about nurses is that they know so many ways to poison your ass. Learn to give good foot rubs.

[blackeagle603]

Wiz,
All I got to say is "If you can swing the deal, marry your trophy wife first." Esp if you live in a community property state. Way cheaper all around.

Seriously, though helps a lot to know a lady who is known by lots of friends/family for long time -- IF you pay attention to them. In my case, I was able to observe my prospective wife retroactively through the eyes of her extended church "family" and summer camp staff "family."

Marriage is mostly about work and working together anyway so it's a vital bit of perspective. You'll learn a lot about a woman you're courting by working with her and seeing what she's like under pressure and when there's work to be done. In my case any concerns were dealt with by observing her at a summer camp's kitchen deep sink day after day, cleaning toilets/cabins with her and seeing how she handled herself and swarms of kids at the lake where she lifeguarded.

Yeah. I married the lifeguard. Eat yer heart out!

Marry in haste. Repent at leisure.