A weapon that is not a weapon...

[JAG2955]

I was riding back from base today on my motorcycle, and while taking a shortcut through a development, some jerk passed me on a corner. Looking back, I should have been fairly pissed, seeing as how he almost killed me, and as I mulled it over on the rest of the ride home, I thought about what weapons I had available on me, and the answer was just my Emerson Commander. Can't have a gun, because Uncle Sam doesn't think that I'm responsible enough. I thought about a small hatchet, which could be just a piece of survival equipment in my tankbag. Then I had I think my best thought: A 1" nut on a loop of 550 cord. I swear, officer, it was just some junk in my bag, and when he tried to grab at me, I swung it and knocked out his teeth.

Thoughts?

[Bullspit]

If you are still on your bike and he gets out of his vehicle (or tries to run you down) your best option is to accelerate out of there.

If he is in a car or truck and you are off your bike you are in a bad situation. Evasion is still your best choice.

The only time you could really use of a weapon would be If he gets out and you are off your bike for some reason.

Rather than a nut and a cord why don't you put 10 or so keys on a short chain that snaps onto your belt? Easier to explain and justify.

[Highspeed]

When I rode bikes I would always have a chain and a heavy padlock looped over one shoulder.

To lock it up when it was parked, obviously.

I expect someone tried to steal your bike recently and you have become very security conscious ?

Back when I was doing medieval re-enactments I would ride to our practice sessions with my sword strapped to my back. It's amazing how polite cage drivers can be to a guy riding a matt black chopped Harley with a 3 foot long sword in a 'shoulder holster'

[randy]

Highspeed, for some reason your post puts me in mind of a Night Stalker episode, only not as reasonable or compassionate.

[Old Grafton]

If you're still ahead of a caged jerk you could always bounce a couple of 3/4" steel nuts off the pavement--"It's a (insert brand of cycle here), Officer--you know how they're always shedding bits and pieces..."

[Fill]

You need a 'traffic cop'.

A blunt force object (such as a hammer or crowbar), carried on a motorcycle, used to extract revenge. When a vehicle is driven too carelessly next to a rider, and they are subsequently almost run over, the "traffic cop" is withdrawn from its respective sheath, and used to smash the windshield of the offending party.

[mekender]

a can of carb cleaner would work nicely... no questions at any times as to why you have it with the bike and it is damn painful to get in the eyes...

[D5CAV]

A number of years ago, I worked with an older guy who spent time in Southeast Asia as a US Air Force pilot.

Once, after a particularly heated meeting, I asked him how he managed to keep his cool in the face of so many jerks. He said "In situations like that, I remind myself 'my airplane isn't on fire and no-one is shooting at me -- today is a good day!'"

Someone did something stupid. It could be because they were ignorant, unaware, or malicious. If they did something illegal, you have the right to take their plate number and report it to the police, fwiw (your word against theirs, but they might get pulled over and questioned if you make your case well enough, which will ruin their day as well).

If you have a tort (some damage), then seek legal redress. If you exact revenge, particularly if you have no tort, it will end badly. The best possible outcome is the police take you to jail and the DA charges you with felonious assault or wilful destruction of property.

Worst case, you are dead. Knocking out someone's teeth is felonious assault. If he subsequently kills you (if the guy happens to be some 300lb good ol'boy with a tire iron in his pickup truck), he can very credibly plead self defense (especially if he's got a big dentist bill to support the claim).

Almost any everyday item can be a weapon (belt, shoelaces, pen, etc.). If your life is in danger, by all means fight to the finish, but don't go picking fights you don't need.

[JAG2955]

Not looking for revenge. I'm looking for a way to defend myself while straddling a 450 pound bike. I guess if the guy stops and gets out, and if I can't get around him, drop the bike, and stand my ground.

[Dedicated_Dad]

The "chain and padlock" is the best suggestion I've seen, so long as "P3AT" is out of the question...

Someone said something about "nuts falling off" the bike - I use acorns. I keep a handfull in my pocket on the bike and in my truck - and I WILL use 'em...

Another option is just the padlock - wear a thick belt with a grommet in the end. Loop belt through buckle to make hand-loop, latch lock through grommet. First strike is to throw it like a baseball into his face as soon as he's within range. You then catch a couple of turns around your hand to shorten it a bit, and proceed to beat him senseless with it.

Never forget that **ANY** bike or biker ***WILL*** lose a fight with a cage. Every time. You **MUST** keep your cool. Escape and evade. Only if cornered, forced and **STOPPED** should you even consider fighting...

DD