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Deep Thoughts

Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2017 6:11 pm
by Weetabix
Did you ever have some random, Jack Handy type thought? We need a place for those. Bonus points if it's original to you, but your favorite Jack Handy quotes are also great to share.

I've always liked this one:
Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.

Fire away!

Re: Deep Thoughts

Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2017 6:13 pm
by Weetabix
How does a blind guy know when he's done wiping in the bathroom?

Re: Deep Thoughts

Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2017 8:25 pm
by HTRN
Why are ther locks on 24 hour store?

Re: Deep Thoughts

Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2017 9:56 pm
by Vonz90
If you are not doing anything, how do you know when you are finished?

Re: Deep Thoughts

Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2017 11:15 pm
by evan price
It's terrible that entire families can be torn apart by something as simple as wild dogs.

Re: Deep Thoughts

Posted: Thu Dec 14, 2017 1:39 am
by slowpoke
“Dark humour is like food





not everybody gets it.”

— Ioseb Jughashvili

Re: Deep Thoughts

Posted: Thu Dec 14, 2017 2:35 am
by Old Grafton
Just because something will be awesome fun does not make it a good idea.

Re: Deep Thoughts

Posted: Thu Dec 14, 2017 4:46 am
by Jered
If journalists wanted to earn an honest living, they'd attend law school and take up barristry.

Re: Deep Thoughts

Posted: Fri Dec 15, 2017 10:24 pm
by Odahi
Why is it that so many mattress companies' names start with the letter "S"? Sealy, Simmons, Stearns & Foster, Serta, Spring Air...

Also, why do I keep seeing just one shoe/boot discarded on the shoulder of the road? Where's the other one? Are there really that many pirates out there?

Re: Deep Thoughts

Posted: Sat Dec 16, 2017 12:23 am
by First Shirt
Why do we park on a driveway, and drive on a parkway?

Why is there an Interstate highway in Hawaii?

Why is a "fat chance" the same thing as a "slim chance" ?

What happened to WD-1 through -39?

Do dyslexic atheists lay awake at night wondering if there's a Dog?