Whelp...I didn't listen to the woman.

[drice]

I thought the best way to separate them was to thaw them out. Guess my mama was wrong.

[Fivetoes]

Yes, i know it was stupid to use my hand as a backstop. Completely my fault and will NEVER happen again.

Wanna bet?

Second that truth.

[Darrell]

Try having a drill bit break while using a hand drill sometime, and drilling the jagged end of the bit right through your thumb.

[Netpackrat]

Ouch. I cut my left index finger real bad once, but luckily didn't hit any major blood vessels. Was in college, in the dorms, using an x-acto knife on my [strike].54 caliber muzzle loader[/strike] model airplane project, and let it get away from me while applying too much force for such a small tool. Roommate and his best friend were newly graduated EMT-1s, and pounced at the opportunity to test their skills. Next thing I know, my finger is wrapped in about 4" of gauze and tape, and I am being rushed to the hospital for stitches. A couple of blue-light geeks to be sure, but it was convenient to have them there.

[Cybrludite]

I did the same thing a bit in January of '05 or so, only not so bad. Gigged myself in the meaty part of the left palm below the thumb while separating frozen smoked sausage. No stiches, but it was a very clean cut. About half an inch wide, by 3/4 an inch at the deepest point. The irrigated it, gave me a tetnus booster, and sent me on my way. My own direct pressure had stopped the bleeding.

[workinwifdakids]

I got a severe splinter, and it almost got infected.


OK, but really -

Major ouch. Swollen like nuts.

If your nuts are swollen that bad, I'd have them checked.

But if you want to separate the burgers, keep them in the bag, swing them like an axe over your shoulder onto the concrete, and they'll break right apart. I do it that way every time. It's kind of odd, but it really works. They split right apart.

[Drone 7 of lots more]

Unloading machine guns from the back of a twice and a half I reached up and grabbed an M73 and put my thumb through the opening in the bottom of the receiver (where the brass comes out), drug it off the truck bed and the sear release contacted my chest and released the bolt, chambering my thumb, sorta.

This early model M73 had a set of pawls designed to grasp the brass being extracted from the chamber and positively expediting it through the ejection port (later designed out as pointless in the M219).

Silly me, rather than calmly having someone charge the weapon, or doing such myself, thus enabling me to remove my offending digit from it's place of durance vile I proceeded to rip it out at once. To the expected effect (although due to the design quirk pointed out in the last para, this may have been the smart play, after all.

Being the hard charging, freshly minted cav-tanking pfc gunner that I was, I said nothing (This was after tank table VI, the moving machine gun practice table at the time) and continued on through table VII and qualifying on table VIII, not an easy trick in '75 on a Sheridan. Being unable to fire normally due to the injury to my thumb I basically had to backhand the bang switch to make things go boom.

Anywho, our troop CO saw my thumb during the last debrief and ordered me to report to Darnall AH (Ft Hood). They sent me home with instructions to soak in hot salt water, to almost immediate relief, the details of which I'll spare from the sensibilities of anyone that might be eating.

Also still have the scars on the left hand from the fastest firing single shot M85 at Ft Carson. Got my damn 100 pts, too.

And this, young padawani, is why the works of JMB (PBUH) are most praise-worthy. (Neither of the weapons mentioned above are his.) Never have the M2HB, or M240 (a JMB derivative) inflicted bodily harm upon this operator, even at my most stupid.

[Drone 7 of lots more]

I got a severe splinter, and it almost got infected.


OK, but really -

Major ouch. Swollen like nuts.

If your nuts are swollen that bad, I'd have them checked.

But if you want to separate the burgers, keep them in the bag, swing them like an axe over your shoulder onto the concrete, and they'll break right apart. I do it that way every time. It's kind of odd, but it really works. They split right apart.

Umm, I'm thinking what's the problem? Leave em together, cook em, put a bun around em, add condiments and commence to consuming...

[308Mike]

COOL!! Battle scar!! Chicks DIG scars, doncha' know?

I'm glad you didn't seriously hurt yourself. Next time use your head, not a knife.

Oh!!!! I forgot the best part. I had x-rays done to see if I'd damaged the bone. I then came back to my bed in Urgent Care. This guy comes up to me. He's wearing a starched white shirt, hospital ID tag, clipboard, etc... He says,
-"Hi, are you Ben?"
-"Yes, I am. What can I do for you?"
-"I'm doing testing for E.D."
-"WHAT?!?!?! ALL I DID WAS HURT MY HAND!!! WHAT THE HELL DID THE X-RAY DO TO ME?"
-"No, E.D. is the Emergency Department. I do testing for them."
-"oooohhhhh well that's different."

You should told him you don't swing that way, and if they want someone to E.D. test you, she better be good looking and have a nice body!!

You also discovered something important about your girlfriend. She appears to be pretty cool under semi-emergency conditions and isn't incapacitated by the sight of blood. I'd say those qualities put her in the "Keeper" category.

[FelixEstrella]

Damn dude ......

Hope you're right-handed.